How many times have you felt that you completely missed a chance at something you want after making one small mistake? Did it leave you feeling stressed and panicked?
This anxiety manifests more often than we think, and most of the time we don’t realize it’s happening. For example, many times we leave job interviews thinking we blew our chances of employment, because we didn’t answer one specific question right. What we tend to overlook is that we answered all other questions very well. Despite this, we might doubt our chances of landing the job, because we have framed the situation in negative, self-deprecating all-or-nothing terms. This is neither fair to ourselves nor factually accurate.
To address this, we can look for the “gray areas” in life. Not everything is black and white. In fact, it very rarely is. If you ever feel less than 100%, ask yourself exactly what % you consider yourself to feel. Is it 80% or maybe 90%? By finding this grey area, we can prevent ourselves from jumping from 100% to 0% and vice versa. It is easier to practice emotional regulation and manage anxiety when we consider the existence of grey areas. Before you move on, think about how you feel right now. If you feel less than 100%, what number would assign to yourself? Why that number? What stressors or worries are contributing to you feeling less than 100%? Now think about why it is not 10% less. What is it that is helping you feel this way? Focus on these positives and savor them. Now consider how you fit into this grey area – nothing is truly a disaster or a success. This emotional regulation technique can help us manage anxiety and grow self-confidence.
Return to this exercise anytime you feel a need to reframe your situation and re-enter a place of gratitude and calm, and download the uMore app!
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